On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Randomize
