you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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