I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Randomize
