He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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