so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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