everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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