So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
