wrigley field is MILF paradise
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
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