Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
