he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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