so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
