I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
the day after is always just damage control
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Randomize
