Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Randomize