Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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