Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
