I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
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