it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
25 Hilarious ‘Sex Clubs’ You Should Try To Join
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.