The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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