My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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