Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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