I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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