Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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