I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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