The brown eye won't let me do that either.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
