Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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