she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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