I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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