We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
