So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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