Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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