If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
