where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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