Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize