he thought i was a dude.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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