While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
