At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
