Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Randomize
