I am puke
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize