I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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