He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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