Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
