To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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