Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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