I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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