i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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