thus making me awesome and them whores
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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