I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
she peed on how many people?
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why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
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Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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