..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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