I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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