Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
