I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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